BY Grammarian
The Democratic Party's national convention was in Los Angeles from August 14 to 17, and on the afternoon of the 14th, while the scripted speeches and bright colors played on television, a few hundred activists gathered at a square downtown.  There were protesters protesting big oil, logging, sweatshops, the death penalty, corporate globalism, the treatment of the homeless, union busting, the corporate media, nukes, military spending, police brutality, the genetic alteration of food, and poor bus service.  Some members of the Los Angeles Cacophony Society, always eager to demonstrate their social awareness, were also in attendance, dressed in knifed-up, bloody clothing, painted deathly green, and carrying signs saying Zombies for Gore.

Before the second terrible folk singer had finished his song about illegal immigration legislation, we were playing clumsy zombie rugby with a rubber brain, spilling fake blood, and trying to eat our signs.  When one of us had to go to the bathroom, we asked two police officers if we could use the facilities in the parking garage below the square.  They smiled and said no. "Well where are we supposed to put together our bombs, then?" whined one of the zombies, and we returned to menacing the Green Party.  A camera crew from MTV stopped to ask us questions about "what our message was," and we said, "grrrr" in various modulations.  Miffed, the newscaster said in her best spoiled-little-white-girl voice, "but this is your chance to get your message out." We said "grrr" again and tried to eat her, but she was able to run away.

Soon enough the crowd began to march the few blocks to the Staples Center. We brought up the rear, shuffling zombielike and continuing our zombie antics as police in riot gear and slow-moving police cars trailed a short distance behind us.  Once we were at the protest area across the street from the center, we got more laughs when we tackled and piled onto a photographer, who pleaded that he was a Canadian and a vegetarian.  Other photographers, seeing one of their own in mortal danger, rushed in to take pictures.  The band Rage Against the Machine played on a stage, and numerous young people looked uncomprehendingly at our signs.  If this generation is our future, god help us.  They were there to protest the politics of Gore, and they don't even know what "gore" stands for.

Forget the "Silent Majority"
Here come the ZOMBIES!
BY Art For A Change,

The members of this street performance group were dressed like the Zombies from George Romero's chilling Science Fiction movie, "Night of the Living Dead." The theatre troupe wore frighteningly realistic makeup and were splattered and drenched in Hollywood special effects blood. Each Zombie carried a sign reading "Zombies for Gore!" Troupe members would chase innocent bystanders and demonstrators alike in their quest for a meal of warm flesh. The Zombies would drop to the ground in fits, or kick around the fake plastic human limbs they carried. This photo was taken on the first day of the Demopublican's proceedings (8/14/2000). Be careful... Zombies have been sighted in your area!

(photos courtesy Independent Media Center, KROQ, Psychocats)

By Grammarian

Why did the Zombies decide to back Gore?
Gore and zombies belong together.  Also, at our Dark Shadow convention, we engaged in unscripted dialog about the issues affecting zombies.  Although we had to agree to disagree on the cannibalism-of-the-still-living issue, we had an inspiring, nearly unanimous vote approving the plank in our platform denouncing the film industry's continuing stereotyping of us as clumsy and hissing.  We walk and speak normally, and with proper medication are able to keep our arms at our sides rather than straight out in front of us.

How were the Zombies received by Gore's campaign team?
The Gore campaign team reacted, we are sad to report, with typical anti-zombie prejudice, first screaming and then running away.  Fortunately, we were able to interface--so to speak--at length with the young blonde who fell over the caterer's table, spraining her ankle, and was thus unable to get away in time.  We felt we had been listened to and that our needs had been addressed.

How about the cops?
(This part is all true) The cops were not amused.  They were looking for their own chance to run amok, and they did not like the competition.  On Monday, when we marched, they waited until nightfall to do their thing, which shows how we and they have a sense of the esthetic in common.  The rubber bullets, baton-wielding horsemen, and pepper guns came out in force before the delegates had to leave the convention center and possibly see us.

(In case you don't know: "pepper guns" is shorthand for paintball guns in which the balls are filled with liquid pepper instead of paint.  They use compressed air to shoot .40 cal rubber balls at about 400 fps.  This hits hard enough to raise a welt, and the balls break open on impact, spreading the stinging liquid around on the skin.  The cops did not hesitate to hit people in the face with these.)

Are there any particular policies of Gore you are backing or any Zombie-specific policy you will be campaigning for Gore to take up?
Gore is for free drugs for old people.  We support this position enthusiastically.  It makes them easier to catch, and we feel that if old people start getting free drugs, it is only a matter of time before everybody gets free drugs.